I have reentered the world of the living again. I feel as if I've finally gotten enough rest.
God...thank you. And thank you for the warm day and the new swimsuit! When I am cold and not moving my body enough, I feel out of balance. Swimming is something I will miss dearly from this little place in Pompano Beach.
I must say, Pompano Beach Florida is trying to woo me back here. I feel the little community winking at me and asking me to stick around for a long time. Did you know that the Gulf Stream ends or meets here in Pompano Beach. That's why it is usually a degree or two warmer here than in Miami.
Interesting stuff.
I found this new business that's opened called "Massage Envy". They offer massages. What a good business idea...I mean there are massage schools everywhere and people say they need massages but nobody can afford $110/hr. So somebody got on the boat and created a great new business.
I joined as a member so my massages are always $39/hr. And baby...did I luck out with a very fine strapping young man as my massage therapist. Oh, don't worry. I've got him booked up with me until I leave. I tell ya, I've been needed a strong black man's hands rubbing me down with lotion (and I can bring my own oils...I asked!). His name is Jean and I am sure he and I will become great friends before I head back to Seattle.
www.massageenvy.com
Thank you Jean for a beautiful massage today. Your hands worked magic from my aching back to my tender calves. Thank you for your kindness and please....start writing. We'll talk next week!
I decided that I was due for a swimsuit that actually fit my new body. Part of my healing process has been accepting my new body. So part of that is getting measured for a swimsuit. Luckily there is a custom shop here in Pompano....where they specialize in fit for each woman's body. I can't remember the name of it but I will and I'll post it here because let me tell you....they are fucking awesome!
I was really shocked to discover what my measurements are today. I remember so clearly being a size 24-26 and feeling uncomfortable in my skin...the lingering emotions are hanging around my ethereal body and I am allowing them to arise, witness them and let them go.
It's funny though, watching these thoughts, and trying to discuss them. Karen and I have been fighting...or rather, I have been rather angry when we've been talking because she is preaching dogma to me and I am asking her to allow me to sit in my emotions and witness them. Acknowledge them, no matter if the story is real or not...it is simply an emotion.
I agree with Karen that thoughts create emotions but I also acknowledge that our cells retain cellular memory which is triggered through intensive body work. I know that a lot of the flashbacks that I have been experiencing are memories that have been trapped in my body that need to be released. Karen has a harder time understanding it and perhaps I should not be sharing this process with her.
I don't have the answers. I do have how I feel in my body and today I feel very good.
I feel as if I have returned to my little routine until it is time for me to go to Seattle and I have no idea how my future will unfold after that...
But you can bet your aunt fanny that I am going to get a book published before 2009.
Just deciding on the right titles and content...
So much love for you,
All the way from over here...
L.
3 comments:
LOL, PSH!! I COULDA BEEN GAVE U THAT MASSAGE A LOONNNGG TIME AGO BABY!
Do I know you Lalala? And/or do you offer massages for $39/hr? I must mention that Jean has beautiful skin and I must say that is my favorite organ. It is what I am most attracted too..and it is a requirement for a man to touch my body. Non-negotiable.
no you don't know me >_> I wish you did tho. Im just a random bored guy that ran across your blog and ended up bookmarking Patsycat, and now im hooked.
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