Change in Plans

Steve called yesterday but it was an hour or so after he said he would call. I didn't notice actually, he told me he was late in calling me and launched into a heavy discussion. It's funny... some of my former girlfriends would have been waiting by the phone noticing that he didn't call and he was late and start wondering if they had done something wrong and this and that and this and that...

I was kinda hoping he wouldn't call or maybe he'd get a better offer because I was really starting to think about some things on the date that weren't bad but they were not exactly a match for me either...but I'll get to that in a moment.

So Steve calls. I told him I forgot that I had a doctor's appointment in Miami on Friday afternoon (like I do on most Friday afternoons) and that I'd probably be later than 7:30.

Then he gets a little flip and said, "Maybe I should come by at 9:00 and just bring condoms."

I said, "What, because I don't want a committed relationship you think all I want is a booty call?"

"Well, what else do you want?" he asked.

"Friendship, companionship, laughter...someone to hang out with and have fun with." I said.

"So I'll bring condoms and we'll watch TV first." he said.

"Well...that's not exactly what I mean. I don't watch TV really anymore unless if it's cartoons or maybe a basketball game and I don't have cable and I do not feel comfortable with you picking me up and taking me to your house. Maybe this isn't a good situation for either of us Steve." I said.

It was at that moment that I remembered the LITE JAZZ.

Here's a fun fact about me: I don't like LITE ANYTHING!

No Lite beer, Lite jazz, Lite housework, Lite conversation, Lite shows, Lite comedies, Lite diet, Lite sex, Lite windows. No Lite Allowed.

LITE is not even a real word. How it has been associated with Jazz is horrifying. How can you put Bob James and Bill Evans in the same genre of music?

Notice the Exception: Lite Brite. I do like a good LITE BRITE...especially when there is a pretty flower or boat in primary colors sitting on a sea of calm, black waters.

Let's put it in a mathematical equation.

Bob James does not = Bill Evans

Bob James is < Bill Evans

Class, < is the less than sign.

Granted, Bill Evans was whacked out on smack for a long time and then he cleaned up his act and continued to write and make incredible music. Sadly Chet Baker didn't have the same path when he got clean...face bashed in with his own trumpet. But his voice...poor Chet.

Maybe if Bob James had been hooked on smack for a while his music would have had more soul.
Bob James peaked when he wrote the "Theme to Taxi". A great tune, don't get me wrong. It is still appreciate today when heard. I mean that was a great show and I really hope that he made a lot of money for his composition and that he gets royalties each time it is played on Nick-at-Nite (NOTE: Nite is not a real word either, but I'll let it pass this time.)

When I was 18 or 19 and starting to explore Jazz (remind me to tell you about the first time I fell in love with an incredible bass player! Keith Moller...Anne, you remember him? From Caruso's? Oh god, was he a great musician and so cute....a tall Dudley Moore less the the alcoholism!) Back then I liked Bob James. He led me to Dave Grusin who led me to Pat Metheny who led me to Dave Brubeck who led me to Miles Davis who led me to John Coltrane and the discovery of Bill Evans.

It did not lead me to Kevin Bacon.

What's this all got to do with Steve and the condoms?

Plenty.

After I didn't sleep with Steve on the first date, he had a chance to think about what I said over dinner. I told him to keep dating other women because I wasn't looking for a committed relationship. I was my usual straight-up direct self. I told him I was taking care of my own needs first and that was priority number one. I've essentially won the lottery for the next two years with a steady stream of income and am taking the time to invest in myself and my creative way of life and that means in relationships too...not just art.

He really wants to be in a committed relationship and that's not what I want. I was clear...very direct...my exact words were:

"Steve, I do not want to be in a committed relationship right now unless if you work for Whole Foods and I get your store discount or if you have citizenship to Italy or France." I did not shout it but I was very clear. You can quote me on that...

That is the truth.

That is My truth.

So I told him he was a great catch for someone else, not me. If I wanted that kind of American relationship he would be my first choice...and you know, if he meditated or had any kind of spiritually developed side, I might consider sleeping with him...but just because you are flexible and do yoga does not mean that you are spiritual...and having a spiritual connection and having a physical relationship can lead to profoundly euphoric experiences.

Certainly worth the wait.

I did agree to go to the Italian festival with him on Sunday and that if he wanted to take a bike ride or go for a walk that I'm his gal...you know, I'd even be up for some ice skating. I really used to love it and it'd be nice to get on the ice before I head out to Seattle...make sure my tights fit and see how they look with a nice little velvet black mini skirt...I love the fashion.

Now, how to tell mom...she was so excited about me dating some guy into mortgage and finance. The good news is that Steve helps people after bankruptcy secure loans to first-time buyers. This could really help me out when I return to Miami. Who knows.

Okay...no more craigslist for me....at least not for today.

So much love...
You know where I am...
Linda