Last Day in Seattle

Today's my last day in Seattle for a while. I am so sad to leave here. My old friends and I have finally be reconnecting and they are such awesome people...it seems as if no time has passed since we last visited. That's how you know you've got great friends. It is still so easy to be myself with them and just hang out.

It makes me want to live here, but we all know how unhappy I'd be with the weather...but I am not ruling it out.

That guy from Match.com didn't work out. Seems as if women don't usually take him up on his offer to meet so he chickened out. Funny, I was pretty clear in my profile that I wanted a man, not a guy. I guess he is still a guy. Good speed match-man. May you find your mate.

I have a lot of loose ends to tie up today before I head out in the morning for the train to San Francisco...final bills to pay, send a few items out to Karen that I don't want to carry in my backpack, a last load of laundry, say goodbye to a few more friends.

Mom really got on my case yesterday about taking this trip and how irresponsible I am. She has a beautiful knack for telling me how awful I am directly and in my face. I had been thinking of visiting her while on the east coast, but am reconsidering now. I have enough of my own anxiety without her adding to the pot.

I know she is only concerned for me and my future and so am I but her tactics are so violent and angry...it is hard. We've made good progress over the last six months with building a stronger relationship and as I've become stronger, she has become more angry. I guess she would prefer it if I were always debilitated and in need if psychiatric care.

Intense emotions arise for the occasion whenever change is present and really, all we are as human beings is change. There is nothing that stays or lasts forever except closed minds and inabilities to change perspectives.

Over dinner last night I tried to explain superstring theory to my friends who have just started thinking about there possibly being something to this universe other than ourselves. I describe string theory using the "Horton Hears a Who". The story of Horton is that he is an elephant on the planet and he hears a little something coming from a tiny dust speck no bigger than the top of a pin. None of the other animals in the forest believes him but he sticks to his convictions that there is something alive on the dust speck. After many pages in the book the universe of the dust speck create a crazy instrument that can amplify their voices and they shout out over and over, "We are here, we are here, we are HERE!" Finally the other animals believe Horton and somehow they all manage to coexist at the same time.

How this ties into string theory is that we are all on different waves or particles within the universe and at times our universes cross and meet and others they are not even aware of others existence. Quantum mechanics looks for larger answers for big questions by going very small, like the dust speck...so if we look inward we will find our answers for the bigger picture outward.

That is a good lesson any day. So today I will look inward and not allow another's point of view create more anxiety for me than I already have which can be quite overwhelming.

So long Seattle. You're a great friend and I deeply love you.

So much love,
All the way from over here....
Linda